I'm too old for this

So I arrived back in Connecticut early this morning. What a trip it was!

I sat on the tarmac waiting for the airshow to finish. A very large, bigoted man from Montana sat next to me and talked to me for five straight hours. Well, he really didn't sit next to me. He sat on me. On my left arm and leg for five hours, with the exception of his three minute bathroom break.

Then, my "nonstop" flight made a landing in Nashville to pick-up more passengers and thankfully drop-off the man from Montana who described himself as "somewhere to the right on Hitler and the left of Cheney." Seriously, that is a quote. My mum told me that if I don't have something nice to say then I shouldn't say anything. I did not reply to that comment or many others like them.

Now that I have visited Vegas Baby, I thought that I should pass along a few suggestions to others who may be traveling there.

First, do not try to look cute and rock the 1978 large hoops, sunglasses and ponytail look while riding the roller coaster on top of NY NY. Your sunglasses will rise off of you, hit you in the face and proceed to fall somewhere on the Vegas strip. Probably smashing into a million pieces. You head will be tossed around like a baby doll's and your earlobes will rip. Fun huh?

Second, do not promise your kids wonderful gifts from Vegas. Personally I found a child-sized bedazzled shirt that read "bitch" and a pink princess shot glass. Stick with the snow globes. Ironic that it doesn't snow in Vegas.

Lastly, expect to see people drinking in bars at 8:00am. Coming from a state rich in blue laws, this one shocked me. Am I a real prude or does it seem fairly disgusting to anyone else to wake-up and instantly walk to a bar to grab a whiskey?

I'm home now. Kids have been snuggled all day. The smoke has been washed out of my clothes and hair. And I am sleeping in my own bed. Coming home can be the best part of the trip.